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Bye Bye, 2025 / 又到年尾
There are years that my Google Map review shown my furthest adventure was a supermarket 5 miles east to my house or a park 10 miles west, as a passenger. But not this year. I went to London 3 times, visited Edinburgh, Durham, drove to Barnsley and flew Hong Kong. I haven’t flown for 8…
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太多經歷，太少意義。
“We had the experience but missed the meaning. And approach to the meaning restores the experience in a different form.” ― T.S. Eliot (Scroll to bottom for English version) T.S Elliot 話，太多經歷，太少意義。 我想寫中文，唔理有無人睇，唔理邊個睇 ，唔理AI 寫得好過我。我想寫中文。 有好多嘢我都有自知之明 ——自知唔明。 個個都寫嘢，寫咗又無人睇。 唔使急，唔係趕住做KOL 急住要分析時事局勢，指點江山，寫完又無人睇，都係寫啲茶餘飯後嘅傷春悲秋，諗下先，睇定啲先。 我日日嘗試做得好啲，我都唔知好啲—係搵多兩個錢，定陪啲細路多啲，定間屋吸塵拖地換床單，周末meal plan 計劃好啲，定睇多啲書，定學多幾隻字，定寫嘢，定畫嘢，定見多啲人，定諗下平時返工有咩進步嘅空間，定學多啲電腦酬備轉工，定填下form搵份有大啲機會可持續發展嘅工？ 我完全唔知點先叫做好啲。我以為工作安穩，但常有控制不了嘅人事問題令我個個月都有衝動劈炮唔撈。跟住我諗，係我自己見識少，係我少少嘢都瓜瓜叫，挨多兩星期又出糧， it can’t be that bad。 究竟點先可以做得啱？我覺得我仲係好似五歲時，幾努力都係俾人打。 人大咗講嘢無咁大聲，自我HR 審查，怕得罪人。但我成世人都唔知點解，不明所意，成日得罪人。我以為我終於開竅嘅時候，下星期又打回原形。人大咗，接受自己渺小如塵，平庸無稽，但我幾唔想俾人見到，要生存，我都要融入社會㗎。我唔想做能人所不能，但我唔放棄做自己，唔諗辦法超越現時嘅我，我就死得。 但同時我仲係default parent，星期一至日都係我最早起身，整早餐放狗幫啲細路換衫預時間出門口準時返學返工，返工前設定洗衣乾衣 D 細路有校服著，放工後煮飯洗碗放狗晾衫摺衫，返工學習HR…
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To live, is to ____ up.
and I have given up pretending otherwise. a year since i printed my new business cards on moo, i had done no blogging, sketched a few lines and hardly touched any python. what a let-down. i still spend far too much time on the phone and drink too much. no one is going to read…
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Picking a lane, or three
I have printed a pile of business cards from moo.com. I don’t know what to call myself. I am not defined by my roles I currently tenure. I have been working in a charity job on Friday, at children theatre on Saturday and at a children home on Sunday, and I also volunteer for the…
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Thoughts before turing 37
In 3 days it will be my birthday. I will be 3 36 has been a strange year. I have never done so much in a year, I think. I have started a Substack last year, before I started working, and a website/blog a couple of years ago, then I ran away and have hardly…
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Week 5 and 6 of Coloriombo
Time flies! Este Macleod’s palette is inspired by Barbara Nissim. Not the style or colours that I normally would pick so it has been a bit of a challenge. Especially page two. I do like page one though, it’s a murmuration of Starlings that my sis-in-law and I witnessed after we went to watch the…
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Week 4 of Colorcombo
The 4th week of Colorcombo is inspired by Leon Spilliaert. On one hand I am glad I have done 4 weeks of journaling. It takes up a considerable amount of time. This week the colour is very cold and sad. It’s a fun thing to do but I am not sure if I really like…
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End of January
I just can’t procrastinate any further. Now we have reached the end of the month and I still haven’t posted any updates. I am still finding my voice, the middle ground between being friendly and honest but refrain myself from oversharing. I don’t know I should write in English or Chinese, in written Chinese or…
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Happy new year, another year.
First day of the year. This is the first time for a while I am alone in the house without my kiddies so I am going to write a quick post before they come back. It has been a very busy year for us. We have decided to move back to Darlington, put the house…
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So another half a year gone
More than half a year has gone. Ya we moved from Scotland to Darlo. That alone kept me very busy last few months. I haven’t got a childminder and Juno isn’t in nursery yet. So I haven’t had time to update website etc. Apart from housework and baby duties, I have also been busy making…
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