I have submitted a job application last Sat evening so that I could be able to enjoy the Sunday with my kids. I read Midnight Crumbs talking about writing a weekly Substack to build a structured life -which is very tempting. But I don’t feel I deserve a space to show who I am without a leap in my career or completing my MPA or I don’t know, have a new kitchen. I met a friend in Durham last weekend and I learnt that she is teaching and supporting older people basic digital skills, which is amicable and I am very happy for her. And it’s a good thing that I meet people because all I can see are people I vaguely know on LinkedIn in impossibly high position that gives me vertigo, and that makes me feel like a failure I guess. And honestly I don’t know anyone in real life trying this hard as a solo parent jiggling a family. I am still trying to understand DAX and M-language. I do enjoy new things and stuff but it’s hard, it’s hard to keep everything to myself. This weekend I managed to take the kids to theatre then to the forest with the dog on Sunday. It will be lying if I say I don’t want that job. I just want a chance to say, again, look, i can do it. Although I surely know I will hate it if I get it.

Let’s see how it goes.